MENU

HPS Logos-01

When Christmas Feels Different: Coping with Loss During the Holidays

At a time when loved ones come together, Christmas can be difficult if you’re grieving. Whether the loss is recent or happened in the past, the festive period can feel very different once you have lost someone important to you. It’s a bittersweet reminder of what is no longer there and of cherished traditions that feel incomplete. 

Grief doesn’t take a holiday just because it’s Christmas – if anything, the festivities can amplify the feelings of loss. However, there are a few actions you can take to help you honour your loved one and cope with your loss over the festive period.

In this article, we examine some of the steps you can take to help you cope with your feelings of loss this Christmas. 

Acknowledge your feelings

There is no ‘right’ way to grieve. We all go through a different process that suits us – and that’s OK. However, acknowledging your feelings can be a therapeutic method of processing your loss. It’s important to remember that feeling sad or even angry is a normal part of the grieving process. Bottling these emotions can sometimes intensify the feeling of loss. Consider writing your feelings down in a journal, speaking to someone you trust or taking a moment to reflect. 

Honour your loved ones 

As a time for family traditions, it can feel like your lost loved one is no longer a part of your celebrations. But this doesn’t have to be the case. You may find it too difficult to keep up old traditions, but starting new ones that remember your loved ones and include them in your present day can be comforting. These can include lighting a candle for them, hanging a special decoration on the tree, or sharing stories about them during Christmas lunch. 

Lean on your family and friends

Let family and friends know you are struggling, and make plans to see them over the holidays. Whether that is celebrating Christmas together, chatting over the phone or making plans to spend time together after the big day itself. Surrounding yourself with friends and family, or even just knowing they are there for you, can be a big distraction at a challenging time when mourning your loss. 

Look for moments of humour or thanks

When grieving, it can be hard to feel positive. It’s natural to focus on what’s missing instead of looking at what is still around us. It’s also important to remember that it’s perfectly acceptable to laugh or feel joy during the grieving process. It doesn’t make your feelings magically better, but it can help you better deal with your situation. Over the holidays, try to take time to appreciate the twinkle of Christmas lights or find comfort in a favourite festive film.  

Be patient with yourself

Whether this is your first Christmas without a loved one or the twentieth, the holidays can bring unexpected emotions to the surface. It’s important to remember to be patient with yourself. It’s okay if your Christmas looks different from societal ideals – what matters is that you do what’s best for you at this moment in time. Grief takes a different journey for each person, and it’s okay to take it one day at a time.  

How Hughes Probate Services can help 

If a loved one has recently died and you are unsure where to begin with the probate process, please get in touch with Julie for friendly advice and expert assistance. 

As a grief counsellor, Julie has the experience, knowledge, and training to support those grieving professionally and compassionately. Remember, grief can be a complex process, but having professional help handle some practical matters while providing a friendly face, can help give you peace of mind.

Although I’m based in Rugby, the Midlands, I work with clients across the UK. If you need my support, give me a call and we can schedule a free initial consultation.